hard injury car accident broken bones

by sunny kinistino

I was in an motor vehicle accident in 2003, broke a lot of my bones on my right side of my body(right arm all 3 bones broken, right femur, including my pelvis completely shattered on the left side). I was hospitalized for 3 months. I had to learn how to sit up on my own, little alone learn to walk again. During my hospital stay I lost my dad. He passed away in November that year. I did not attend his funeral cause of the amount of pain I was in. Till this day I cry because I didn't attend. Just the thought of pulling up there in an ambulance attached to so many tubes being in a gurney was to much to bring myself to go. That day still depresses me alot. I live in parents house now and got alot of memories of him every second of the day. So I guess you can say, atleast I don't got that memory of him laying in his casket. I got all the happy memories of him, but miss him like crazy.Its been 11 years since my accident now.

I have tried every day to cope with my pain, but it has come to the point that I can not sleep at nights. Waking up in so much pain, crying not knowing what to do, worried about having to get up soon to get my kids ready for school. I have gone to Dr.s for along time now,but all they have done was issue me a perscription for the pain...... funny, because tylenol, n whatever I tried just doesn't take the pain away. Now I am 35 going on 36 years old, and the pain has just gotten worse. where do I go from here? And how do go apon living a normal life......to me what is normal? Living with this pain on a daily basis? If I can turn back time, which I can't, I wish I never got in that car, the one that nearly took my life away from my 2 girls I had at the time. Thank god for my mother that was there to care for my children. RIP dad.
What to do now, and how to go about, to raise my 5 children now?

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